The Ballad of the Old Bachelor

Let me describe an episode from recent memory
The last few years, though I have slowed, I’m not a retiree
And my retirement account in summary – it’s short
A bargain, at a good discount, if genuine – I’ll sport

By any measure, I deserve the better things in life
I want what many will observe is odd – I want a wife
(here I’ll confess that my desire Is hardly a volcano
The spirit’s willing, but I tire -- still hard enough to say no)

And so the purpose of my quest if I’m to clarify
Not to confuse or obfuscate – a diamond to buy
My lady friend – no plaster doll, says opposites attract
“we’ll consummate, but after ring”, is how she did react

A pattern that’s as old as time, a program in her genes
Still I must learn to play my part, to get me in her jeans
I find a parking, a good spot, on 47th Street
And buy a stone – forget me not – to sweep her off her feet

I rush to her, she’s overjoyed, and gives me a big hug
But asks me: can we get perhaps, a bigger house – I shrug
I ask: “but why?” she says: “we’ll need it, for our nursery”
“And I’m afraid much sooner than our anniversary”

Author notes: https://allpoetry.com/contest/2785734-Random--Seven-Letter-Word-Play Summary                    Attract Clarify                          Bargain Confuse                      Parking Observe                      Diamond Pattern                        Deserve Volcano                        Measure Genuine                      Nursery Retiree                        Program Account                        Episode Purpose                        Plaster